Jul 20, 2009

My deepest, darkest secret

There are two words which I just can't pronounce : Infrastructure & Theta. And they are not even widely acknowledged tongue-twisters!

I mean who the fuck creates these words. Who places two 'r's in strategically idiotic places in a word so as to make it impossible to articulate.And I suspect I am not the only one here. I have seen many people using the short forms like "infra","i-structure" ,"IS"," roads and bridges", "r & b" in conversations which they try to project as cool but is actually a trick to mask their inability to pronounce the correct word.And we cry of lack of infrastructure in this country. I say if we can't pronounce it how can we expect to develop it.A wise man once said that development begins at the grassroots level. Change the word - let's say to "bricky" or "tartarum" and you'll see 10 Shanghais in India by the end of the next year. How is China doing it? Haven't you figured it out yet - THEY DON'T SPEAK ENGLISH.And I am especially sick because in my line of work THIS word just doesn't leave me alone. I mean, " INDIA LACKS GOOD SPORTS INFRASTRUCTURE." is the most uttered sentence in this business.How unlucky can I get?
For those who are reading this with contempt for my articulation abilities, I say get your tongues checked or apply for a job at a circus nearby because no normal person can pronounce INFRASTRUCTURE with ease.

Thank god I don't have to say "theta" much these days.I have left theta far behind in those days of trigonometry & differential equations."Teta", oh sorry, "Tetha" sorry again, "Thetha" , sorry yet again, "Theta" is a nightmare of a word to speak, if you haven't realized it yet.It's a total tongue-fuck. Look at alpha, beta, gamma, pi,delta,iota,omega,mu .. they are so smooth, so easy and hence have become so legendary in what they represent or how often they are used in life governing physical laws or mathematical equations. Yeah yeah, "THETA" also has a fair share of usage( though nothing in comparison to others i mentioned) but that's because of limitation of Greek alphabet and obsession of scientists with them.No wonder "theta" was the symbol of death in Greece. Symbol of death it is. Death of linguistic common sense. Death of beauty of speech.

Jul 7, 2009

Greatest Ever?..hmm.. How? Are you joking?

First it was about not being consistent enough to justify the style.
Then it was about not breaking Pete's record.
Then it was about not enough competition.
Then it was about not hitting volleys.
Then it was about not hitting aces.
Then it was about not enough mental strength.
Then it was about not winning on all kinds of surfaces.
Now it's about not winning against that bullfighter in the finals ( even if he can't manage to reach the finals).
Then it will be about not winning all 4 finals in the same year.
Then it will be about not winning all the finals in straight sets.
Then it will be about not controlling your emotions when you win or lose.
Then it will be about not making loud grunting noises.
Then it will be about not winning with one eye closed and both hands tied together.

You people, do you just want to keep debating because you love debating or are you seriously blind/dumb.

Mind-boggling Science Fiction 3

Me to my personal Artificially Intelligent buddy, Rocket:  Rocket, can you do this calculation for me. What's 7 + 4? Rocket: Dude, d...